"Parents and authority, take the time to listen to those underneath you. You may just find that you were even slightly wrong the whole time"
A shout out to parents for their difficult job of raising kids. A shout out to kids who have to bear it all when their parents make a mistake it raising them.
Being in authority is hard. Probably one of the hardest things I have ever done. Being a boys dean of kids who are pretty much your age is also very difficult. But how it has been such a growing experience.
Things have been a little more relaxed here on the compound and it has caused some problems for both the girls and the boys. As well I have passed the honeymoon stage with the kids, meaning that I no longer think they are perfect little angels, lacking flaws. We all have our flaws. They boys have been late to different functions recently, mainly evening worships. This would normally not be a problem; however we have been doing choir for about a month now and we have had limited time to practice every day (30 min) all that we know. Being late to this especially wastes our choir director's time and upsets her and prevent its from really doing anything productive.
One of the reasons of being late is because sometimes the boys play football late, and then they can't get ready in time for the worship. They have an hour to take a bath and eat and put on new clothes but sometimes they are unable to accomplish that in the time they are given. Sometimes however, work goes over time, and so they play over time, they don't get ready in time, they're late to our practice, they eat during study hall, they don't study, and it just continues.
So I've been getting on to them about being better stewards of their time. At first they were doing ok when the first punishment was given. Then they would fall off the wagon. Then they would get back on and then fall off again. Kinda up and down and our choir lady was getting fairly annoyed and upset.
So I began to threaten some of their free time with the intention that they would be more on time if football playing was on the line. It kinda worked. The whole time I felt like i was giving plenty grace and mercy.
But then they fell off the wagon again. And I saw defiance starting to arise
So this time I gave the full ultimatum: because they couldn't eat their food and get ready on time in that hour and balance their time, they wouldn't be able to play football for a week. Seems a little harsh.
Even though not all were fully guilty, the punishment was universal. I did this with the intention of having someone step up to the plate and lead the boys to get their stuff done because I don't want chaos to ensue when I leave.
Well as you can imagine, they didn't take it very well. After I finished talking, they let their opinions out about the nature of the situation, the punishment, other things, how they weren't going to obey and pretty much more plans of rebellion as a result of this punishment. I def don't agree with the last part
However, in it all their were some points made in it all: I couldn't punish them all because all weren't guilty, I didn't give them enough warning, I should have given them another chance, the punishment didn't fit the crime, they were late because sometimes they were late coming back from work which is why they played later and were thus late to everything else, etc.
Some points were valid. Others I didn't think so. In the end I still listened.
For I think it can be very easy to let power cloud judgment and skew a decision that is made. In other cases, sometimes, parents and authority are wrong and we make mistakes.
Even though I didn't believe in the spirit of rebellion as a result of the punishment, I did consider their last appeal.
One of my boys suggested that I didn't give them enough warning before giving a punishment and that I should allow them to prove themselves. So I would give them my watch and they would come up from playing on time, and everything else would work itself out.
I listened and told them I will consider their appeal as they very angrily left and griped and moaned concerning everything.
I'm thinking about it. I'm thinking about how Jesus give grace and mercy. And I'm wondering in what places have I made a mistake. In what places was I right. In what places were the kids being kids and in which cases were they being adults. It what place was I an adult and in what place was I a kid.
So many questions. I'm considering their proposition and even made a flow chart of the possible outcomes of this scenario.
I've been praying a lot.
Why is this all do hard!?
This story shall be continued. The outcome of it all shall be told.
May Jesus be in the center. And may God help us all.
Alabanza
* sorry I didn't spell check. I was in a rush *
Kameron Carter
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